We have someone in our church who works as a 'divorce/marriage mediator' and at church and other places around town is always putting on marriage seminars and such. That is great, we need people who are passionate about the sanctity of marriage and working to help people to keep the marriage pure and what God has in mind for it, however he is almost a little out of control, obsessive about marriage.
Don't get me wrong, obviously I believe in marriage. I hope to one day be married and take that very seriously and would probably enjoy one or two of the seminar things they are doing that are to help in keeping the communication fresh and fun and all that. It was just a little overboard though with the constant marriage seminars and sermons at church.
Though, those have slowed down thankfully. He's been preaching a lot since we've been without a pastor, and has not specifically preached on marriage each time, but there was a while there it was every time he preached. Talk about making the single people feel unworthy. I honestly had to leave twice during those sermons because of how it came across to those of us who are single.
I can't specifically say why now, but for some reason the message came across one sabbath that marriage was what is valued most to God and it was then easy to infer then that those who are single are incomplete and would not have all the joys God has for them by not being married and . . . I had to get up and leave that Sabbath because the hurt and frustration came to the surface in tears and I just couldn't let people see me crying (I wasn't feeling sorry for myself just . . . I didn't want people asking what was wrong either). I have heard sermons about marriage that did not exclude the single people and actually provided food for thought and encouragement, but that particular one, and one previous, wasn't drawing me closer to God that day, instead I felt beat upon with no hope unless I got married. I know that I was not the only one to leave, and also avoid the weeks he preached. Since then, I've noticed that most of the single people tend to avoid coming to church, or staying for the sermons the days this individual speaks. Which is sad, because he really hasn't been speaking on marriage as much in his sermons, or in the same venue since he's been preaching practically every other week or more . . . I am looking forward to the potential pastor coming and preaching in a couple weeks.
Hmm, that was a little rambly and ranty almost . . .
This sabbath, there was a form in the bulletin that is basically a sign up for this next marriage thing that they are doing, and at the top it said something to the effect of "Do you feel that you and your spouse are like ships passing in the night?" During the announcements it was brought to everyones attention and suggesting people sign up for it. I leaned over to a friend, pointed to the phrase and whispered "Yes, but I don't think that this would help me with that problem." She chuckled and whispered back something along the lines of, "Maybe you should sign up and there might be single male ships looking for single female ones" Which was so bad, because we both were sitting up front because we were leading praise singing, and were trying not to burst out laughing.
